i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Randomize
