I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
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