Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
