He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
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