I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
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