Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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