and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
