this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
