If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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