i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize