Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
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