he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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