I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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