you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize