i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
