sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
You were trust falling into bushes
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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