Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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