**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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