Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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