On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
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