who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize