They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
i came on her dog
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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