If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
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