My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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