No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
