fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
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