My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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