just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
