bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
