i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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