You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
