How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Randomize
