I want to make a zoo with you.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
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