He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
why do cheetos always look like penises
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
ttyl tear gas
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
