So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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