I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Randomize
