My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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