You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.