It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Randomize