His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
