Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
