You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
