doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
