I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
