My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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