Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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