erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
