Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
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