I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I cut my penus on the lid.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
