I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
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