You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
