I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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